Rolling over 2

Things are not good, fair readers. I got in a little fight, a scuffle, really. Jen and Josh are freaking out because my face is all swollen and I have huge gashes, a couple punctures, and another docked ear. I feel fine, really. I've been eating, meowing, sleeping, and doing all my normal things. I have suffered indignity after indignity, however. First, Josh shaved my head so he could get a good look at the damage. Humiliating, but bearable. Then, Jen locked the cat door so I couldn't get out - now we are getting crazy. I have been stuck inside for two days and I can't take it. I have had to take drastic measures. Yes, that's right: I peed. I peed TWICE right on Sam's clothes left in the hallway after his bath. I had to shake them up. I heard them talking this morning and Josh is much more rational. Jen said that I will be given another chance and, if I sin again, I go "back." Josh said they should just leave me outside and if I get killed, at least I enjoyed myself to the end; plus, he didn't want to give me the chance to kick it up a notch and pee on the new rug. Ah, fair readers, I don't know what my fate has in store for me yet. All I know is that I am locked in the utility room. If I meow a lot, Jen opens the door just enough to squirt me in the face.