Buy the Farm

Sam: Mommy, we can get a little dog at our house named Juno and then Rufus can go back to his house.

Jen: But this is Rufus's house too. Would you like him to go back to the farm?

Sam: Yes. He can go, and we can get a dog like Juno.

The backstory is that some family came up from Olympia and brought a puppy. I, naturally, made myself scarce - not because of the dog, which probably weighed a pound; rather, I had some appointments to keep in the neighborhood, and a cat can only handle so many kids (read:tail-pullers) in his yard.  Like, none. 

So Sam was enamored of the dog, fine. So he used a high-pitched, cute, puppy-talk voice that one never hears used with cats. Also fine. But let me just say that I am fully aware that when animals - usually dogs - go to live with cousins on "a farm," or when someone "buys the farm," that these are euphemisms for putting an animal down. Which is, in itself, a euphemism for euthanasia, which is not a city in the Orient, but rather, Death. I am an urban cat! I will not go to a farm! 

I'm sure this puppy-spell that was cast over my Sam will disappear soon. If not, Teddy is definitely on my side and is becoming quite scrappy himself. He will fight tooth and nail for me to stay. I'm not worried.  

Where's Rufus?

Teddy doesn't like being inside what Jen refers to as the "sit-and-spin," so he plays on the outside. Sort of defeats the purpose of having one, since you use it as a safe place to put a child so that you can do things like visit the litter box, if you know what I mean. Teddy also seems confused by his shape sorters. He would really like the shapes to neatly fall back out of their respective hollows. Silly. Sometimes, he grabs a shape through a hole and tries to get it out while holding it in his fist. I do believe that is a classic experiment involving monkeys: Will they know to release the object in order to get their hand out? 

Ridiculously Long Video

I don't know who likes to watch these. It's not as if it's a video of me hunting a rat - that would be entertaining! I don't like to brag, but there are at least five blood and organ stains on the front patio from my kills. No mean feat. Mien feet? 

Noise

There is a lot of it when you live with two children. 

Both Sam and Teddy love that piano. Sam calls it a "peeneeno." At least he is somewhat trained thus far. He knows, for example, that we don't hit the keys and we don't play with our feet. 

Snake Wrestling

Sam just doesn't know when to stay out of the shot. 

School's Out

Sam dropped out of school. Jen could no longer tolerate the unedited emails sent out by the director. With the most hellbent of hellions in the place, the director was clearly getting the better deal out of the arrangement (free childcare/education). Reports of "L hitting" and "L screaming" ... and then there was the incident where Jen had to wrestle Sam's artwork out of L's father's hands because L tried to steal Sam's intellectual and physical property. Enough was enough. 

So Sam will be "home schooled" for the summer until starting a new school in the fall. I suppose this means a lot of art projects. 

And cultural excursions. 

And a multitude of walks in the double stroller. 

No Snakes on the Table

If cats aren't allowed on the furniture, surely, neither are reptiles of any sort.